In order to redeem myself, I have been commanded to write an essay about my friend Kait. I had taken some head shots for her a while back. I then took one of them and made it into art for an art show. The piece actually sold and was praised for its feeling and realness. Let me explain. The part called for her to look like a recovering meth addict. She did some amazing makeup work on herself and the result was someone who looked like a wreck. This is an enormous feat, considering Kait is one of the most beautiful people I have had the pleasure to call friend. So to start off, I will not be showing you the picture I sold, but I will be showing you this one:
She is the blonde and the gorgeous brunette is Lindsay her best friend. I was lucky that weekend to spend time with such amazing women, even though they almost drove me crazy!
That is her and I at ACL drunk and tired. No she is not naked. She was a sport and put up with my camping hobbies!!
So on to the Essay...
KAIT: AN ESSAY by Toad Bennett
Considering you have made it this far, I can assess that you find Kait to be beautiful and interesting. Now I will successfully convince you of her other qualities. These being Humor, Genius and Love! There are few humans of this rock that can say they possess so many of these great qualities. We are in a drought, sort of speak, of true talented and original people. This saddens me, but then I think of my friend Kait and all is well in my mind.
When first meeting this tiny blonde woman, we came to the conclusion that it was a tragedy we had not met each other sooner. We had worked at the same place of business for quite some time, yet had never crossed each other's path. We met at a second job that our mutual friend and equally talented friend John Milner had needed help with. It consisted of sitting around telling mindless people where their event was and if they needed water they could find the fountain down the hall and to the left. So this gave us plenty of time to chatter about our lives. We found out that we had a lot in common. Especially the addiction to laughter. Kait the actress could cause me to blurt out large amounts of chuckles at any given moment. She also scared the living daylights out of me the first night we went out on the town. She decided to show off her acting skills in a very dramatic monologue. It consisted of tears and a story of grief. I had no idea this was her. I thought I was watching a completely different person. And then she snapped out of it and started to laugh. She had me, the one that prides himself on not being easily deceived. I was one thing, very amused.
After the laughter came deep thought. Maybe I should call it a deep maze in which we could never solve. We were very good at finding new ways through this maze, but we never could understand it. Religion, education, sex, war, politics and even reincarnation, there wasn't a part of the maze we didn't talk about. Her understanding of the world at a young age was phenomenal. She investigated anything she didn't quite believe or understand. This is a part of intelligence that most do not speak of, especially in our hometown. Faith states are what I call them. The Bible Belt is the region. Questioning the core belief was definitely frowned upon. I am glad it didn't stop her from filling her head with knowledge. Even though I had explored the maze myself, I was sometimes hesitant or lazy to go further. Kait pushed me forward, handed me knowledge and tested my mind.
Love is a hard thing for people like me. It is another part of the maze I don't quite understand. I know I feel it for many people. Sometimes without knowing why. I do not take it lightly though. I am not a huge fan of most people I meet and could do without large groups of friends. I like having the few people I can spill my guts out too. When I say few, it could possibly be only three. Kait is one of them. No matter what I say. No matter how unrealistic, unsophisticated, unintelligent or even down right mad, Kait seems to listen to it all. This is how you truly love someone. All that other bullshit is just chatter to me. I needed that when I met Kait, she helped me out from under my rock.
And in true Essay form, in conclusion and with many gramatical and punctuation errors, Kait is in a league all her own. Beauty, Intelligence, Humor, Humility and Love. She possesses more than most beings on this planet. She is a whole lot more than just a pretty little blonde woman.



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